We Got HOZE'D

See what I did thar? I did a play on words and combined "We got hosed" with "Hozier". Because Hozier is an evil wizard.

My mother is at war with the US Postal Service.

My friend Courtney's car almost turned into a pancake.

Here's the story!

That's October of 2014 to be specific.

Don't worry, they still found stuff to do in Atlanta.

You couldn't have been nursing a hangover. You're like 9ft tall. Andre the Giant had to drink like 80 cans of beer just to catch a buzz.

I've only been to Montreal. That's the closest to a European experience I've had. Besides that, I've never left the east coast.

Meat Land: It sucks the life out of her body and soul.

 Fedex for life now, baby.

The word "Squeezle" looks weird because I was trying to decide how to spell it. "Squesel"? "Squeasel?" "Squweasel?" Weasel + Squeeze.

Hozier, if I ever go to your concert, I'm bringing a lucky rabbit's foot.

Update: I have discovered some information that proves my theory of Hozier being an evil wizard false! He is actually an evil witch doctor.

Apologies, Hozier. Here's a drawing of you as a modern day evil witch doctor about to put the hoodoo on someone. Likely on me or someone I know.