It's The Great Ak, Oedipus Rex!

The Crappy Christmas Cartoon I Did Last Year

Hey guys. I'm still working on this year's Christmas cartoon. Life has been pretty busy between getting my book finished and long hours at work. But to hold you over, here's a classic.

THE ARCTIC C-TRAIN

Coming this December.

 Adventures will be had by all!

In other news, egg nog is back in stores! Get your SoCo guys! Saint Nogmas has visited our markets to grant us the gift to help us all cope with our annoying relatives whilst slowly clogging our arteries with creamy wonders.... that sounded wrong. Let us take a moment to give thanks to the drunken old elf....

Adieu, you cool little cucumbers.

Hey Guys,

Hope all is well. Just wanted to make a quick announcement. November is usually a quiet time for Crappy Cartoon due to NaNoWriMo.

More info about that shindig here: http://nanowrimo.org/

I'll be trying to focus on finishing up my book and getting it ready for publishing.

I also have a big vacation coming up so that's going to eat up a lot of time too.

But never fear! I have a crazy Christmas cartoon (yay for alliteration!) planned for December.  I'll have more announcements on that toward the end of the month. For now, keep yourselves entertained.

BBL. Gone fishing.

Toodles.

Sometimes I Wonder

What my life would have been like had I picked up the trombone in 4th grade. 

I Just Saved A Bunch Of Money On My Flu Shot By Being Allergic To Latex!

So everyone is getting sick where I work. Yesterday a guy sat right next to me and had the nerve to tell me he had a fever of 103 last night. I don't do well with fevers. I didn't want to revisit the experience I had with the great Pork Pox epidemic of 09. (AKA Swine Flu, Bacon Lung, Ham Fever).

^ (The redrawn and upgraded version of the original cartoon) ^

Flu dreams are psychotic.

Anyhoodles.

Needless to say, I floored it straight to the nearest pharmacy when I got out to loot all their Purell and get my flu shot.

For me, getting a flu shot is always difficult.

The second I say "latex allergy" to a doctor or pharmacist, they go into panic mode. It's like when you're adjusting the temperature in the shower and it suddenly gets really hot or really cold. I'm the really hot/cold water and the doctor is the one trying to climb up the wall.

I always hated any science experiment in high school because the gloves we had to use always made my hands itchy. I didn't realize it was because of the latex. No, I learned my body hated latex in a very interesting way in my second year in college.

NO, NOT THAT KIND OF "INTERESTING".    CREEPOS.

I was a theater major so I took a stage makeup class. One day we were working with prosthetic and we were using liquid latex to apply it. I made myself into a bluebird. It came out pretty cool.

I had successfully sculpted a piece and applied it. But you know what they say, behind every silver lining there's a dark cloud.

I woke up the next morning feeling strange......

And I still went to class looking like THAT. Try reading the whiteboard when you have blurry Quasimodo vision.

So in a nutshell about the flu shot, I had to wait an hour to make sure they had the correct vaccine and latex-free tools. They did. I have never been injected with any sort of latex and didn't want to risk going into anaphylactic shock. It doesn't look pleasant. 

And it was actually cheaper than the regular shot so I got a refund. Thank you allergy to latex for giving me some kind of benefit.

THE END.

CCT Presents: A Very Crappy Halloweenie Special

Boogie Man has an adventure!

Hippy Breathday

Some pictures of cake and crap.

So yesterday for my birfday, Skippy made me a very nice three layered cake which I'll probably be eating for breakfast for the next week. He made homemade buttercream icing and whipped out all his cake decorating tools. He told me to pick out some colors and decorate half the cake.

My side came out like this:

I realized my favorite colors are Mardi Gras. There's a Tim Burton-esque feel to it with the swirls. My favorite chunk is the weird spiraly flower on the bottom.

And then my wrists started to hurt and I said "SCREW IT!"....

Yeah, I had to. I was going to give him bleedy eyes but I didn't want to mess it up.

Meanwhile Skippy's side came out all professional and pretty.

I made a wall. It says "WALL" :

Skippy decorated his side of the top and told me to fill the rest in.

Thus I invented Cake-Libs.

It was a wonderful Hippy Breathday. And yes, I made it say "Jilbo Baggins".

A Look At Soap Suds Beards

Sometimes we just need a soap suds beard to express our feelings.

Oedipus Style

Just screwin' around before I have to make dinner.

Oh Yeah, I Forgot Seasons Happen

Fall doth approacheth. I have been spoiled by the Florida seasons: Summer, Not-So Summer and Christmas.




So far it's just been random acts of itchy nose and sinus headaches. I haven't turned into a Benadryl horse yet.

A "Walkman" Down Memory Lane

A look into my life around ages 11- now and how my Sony Walkman was there for all of it....

The Faire, the Faire and the Ginger Haired

Warning! Contains extremely an graphic cartoon.

(There was a sideshow guy that did piercy skin things. Ye be warned.)

More after the jump because it's a long one.

Cthulu Pictures

The WaterFire Providence Facebook page posted a link to Flickr of the August 24th Cthulu Show. There are a couple great ones of the Poop-Turnips. And I also had no idea the Gargoyle was wearing shorts and sneakers.

Also, the Blaaarrargh has teeth.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/waterfire_providence/sets/72157635304046668/

Sneak Peak Chapter Illustration From Ma Booook.

Why yes, I can do not-crappy things when the powers of Motivation, Patience, and Coffee align.

I am insanely satisfied with how this turned out and just had to share it with the world. It took a day and a half, my veins are throbbing out of my hand, but it is worth it.

Plus when I insert it into the book, it's going to be kind of dinky and you won't be able to see the full details. 

Large version of drawing and some info on my slowly upcoming novel, "The Queen's Descent" after the jump. Warning: Minor spoilers.

And don't you fear, more Crappy Cartoon Stories will arrive. I just need to keep that coffee flowing. By flowing I mean into my mouth.

It's Sparkling Cider By The Way.

Made of 100% carbonated apples!

Le Squee

Just listened to Night Vale's podcast titled "The Phone Call". Finally heard perfect Carlos's voice. I hope the man in the tan suit didn't mess up his hair!


If you're another soul wondering "What the crap is Night Vale and why do I keep hearing about it on the internet?!" just as I once was,

Well Google it. 






Because they have a floating cat and a clock tower that is actually invisible and teleports constantly.

Cthulhu Went Up To Providence Looking For A Ballerina To Eat

I saw some weird shit and a gargoyle wanted me. I without a doubt fried the coke though. (Not to be confused with Nuking the fridge or jumping the shark)

I Discovered Night Vale

Now drink to forget you saw this.

That Time There Was A Girl In The Men's Room At Friendly's

So we went to Friendly's over the weekend and Skippy had a strange moment.

Usually I know I'm in a men's bathroom by one slight difference.

I was judging her ensemble more than her choice of going into a men's bathroom. She looked like an awkward monarch butterfly.

I don't know what her story was, but the next thing we know she rushes out the door and Skippy sees her sprinting passed the windows. Very strange.

Moral of the story: If you make an awkward mistake, don't freak out if someone sees you. It just makes it more awkward for everyone. And chances are no one gives a crap. Unless they're 13-16 year old girls. Then they're judging you. They judge everything.

This Post About Beastly Kingdom Gets The Novel Award

Or maybe I should title it:

Imagine Dragons! (not the band though)


There's a blog called Little Miss Disney and some pretty cool stuff is posted on it Like how there's a secret hotel room in Cinderella's Castle.

And I was asked to do some Disney art so I drew up a few things this morning:

Little Miss Disney, feel free to post any of these pictures on your blog.

And now I'm thinking about dunking a turkey leg in Dole Whip.

And have you ever wondered why there's a dragon on the Animal Kingdom logo but no dragons in the park?? Well I recently found out that there were different plans for where Camp Minnie-Mickey is.

Maybe Little Miss Disney will feature something and it'll be awesome and I'll add a link to this post but for right now I'm giving you my crappy cartoon version of the story.

After the jump.

You Meet Some Weird People At The Laundromat.

EXPOSITION!

So the place I live at has a laundry facility and they have a PRINTER for a dryer. As in it was sent from hell and doesn't like doing it's one job God gracefully bestowed upon it so it could walk this earth.

This dryer is worse than what I had to put up with in college and that is saying things...

While I'm glad the washer doesn't go all Jumanji and pee on the floor, the dryer is the opposite side of the coin. It has only two results for me.....

In the CLICK of the Night.....

Yes. I have a huge lamp on my table yet I reach for my phone. Because it was closer and I thought something was going to grab my wrist. Last thing I want is to sport a Jamie Lannister.

My thoughts: "What am I looking at right now?"

I was really hoping for the Boogie Man sneaking in to use the bathroom or something. I think that face is worse.

A Song Of Wine And Beer

"I am not a Wino! I can still count on one hand how many times I have drank a bottle of wine.... wait."

-said me.

Here's a fairly recent cartoon that goes along with the theme.

At the end of each episode, Skippy always says "Just wait til it gets crazy!"

I don't know how Martin does it. Does he not love any of his characters?!

Now you know where I got my banner from.

PS My pen shipped. It should be here by Tuesday.

PPS Quick story: I learned the hard way that I should stop using the community laundry room in our complex. If you put it on anything other than high ass-heat, it doesn't do anything. Because of the high ass-heat, my jeans smelled a little funny and I think they got semi burnt. I shoved a dryer sheet in each pocket to quell the stench.

Yesterday I used it for some towels and random clothing, not too much. Three hours in the dryer later, everything was still dripping.

So I had to go to the laundromat this morning to rewash my clothes. And that is how I finally started reading Game of Thrones. I've seen the show. I know what happens. But I wanted the full experience. Plus the descriptions are quite lovely.

More on my laundromat experience next week about a poor lady in pink sweatpants.