I Am Penless

I wonder how many people saw that as a dirty word.

Not long ago I accidentally popped open my tablet pen. There's a little green chip that was sticking out and I guess I scratched it or knocked it just right because now my pen is going CRAaAAaaaAAaaAaAaaaZaAaAaAaAaaY!

It might also be the fact I put it in my mouth when I move my laptop to a different room.

So I'll be ordering a new one soon. Now I can finally get the correct pen for it considering the one it came with kind of has a nib jammed inside it. Why? Well.... I didn't know the tips wore out so fast so I waited til it was a stub. One person on Deviantart said "Oh just hold a needle over a flame then stick it into the nib. It'll soften and come right out.

LIES. Nothing softened and I ended up burning my finger. So for the last year I've been using the pen from an older tablet.

Very sorry to say there won't be any new MS Paint drawings for the time being so I'll just be transferring some older stuff to here. Bummer too, because I wanted to depict how Skippy and I play Lord of the Rings: War In The North.



Here's some stuff-

 My college had pointy furniture that was plotting to kill me. I couldn't feel my pinky for hours.

Not pictured: the bouncy house that was outside.

So I was talking to a friend of mine. He wasn't responding so I took a shower. It was perfect timing.

This has some stories behind it.

In Florida, it was essential to have pest control come out every so often to bait traps and inspect for termites. Yes, traps. In our first year at the house, we had rat poop in our attic and a carcass was found when they were whacking around inside the A/C unit. Which we had to replace because they blew the whole thing.

That is what she said.

This guy was from a legit company to do an inspection. He found nothing and went along his merry way. Hell, I think he even rolled in our garbage cans from off the street.

Still! When you come to the door all sweaty-hog-like holding a pitchfork, IT DOESN'T LOOK GOOD! I am a very paranoid person with an overactive imagination!

I think this was the same guy that accidentally saw my mom sunbathing naked in the backyard.

Skippy just put on "Cabin In The Woods"

And there's only one way I'll get through it.

Good thing I have vodka and pineapple.

Keep ya posted for updates throughout the movie!

7:56PM: MY THOUGHTS SO FAR:
Whodafack are the business men and wasn't that guy in something?

My predictions:
Red Head with no undies: Going to die. Possibilites of sex: 50%
Blonde: Sex. Maybe a sword through her chest.
Thor: I hope he doesn't die. He's going to shank someone and save the day for sure. I'll do a shot if he hits something with a hammer.
Bong Coffee Cup Guy: 1)That's crafty. 2) He is going to see spooky things, may have sex with the undy ginger and then come to a gruesome end.

Also:

"Honey toes"

Open Up A Can Of Dole Whip-Ass!

Here's a picture I found on google because nowadays people like pictures more than they do words. At least that's how I am. 

This is what I'm talking about in this post.

http://echoluxe.wordpress.com/

So you know how Disney makes this thing called a "Dole whip" people obsess over? I guess it's like Horde vs. Alliance. I'm on the turkey leg Blood Elf side of the war. 

Anyfreakinway,

I got a better pineappley fandango idea for ya rather than that con-flabbit soft serve ice cream and that is the Stoli Doli drink.

The Stoli Doli is pineapple infused vodka and I've already had a lot of it and I'm surprised my typing is this exquisite. But for those of you who don't have the patience to infuse your vodka just do this:

Step 1: Stoli.

Step 2: Dole Pineapple Juice from a can.

Step 3: Garnish with a pineapple ring.

Step 4: ????

Step 5: Deliciousness.

Optional Step: Ice.

I didn't include measurements because I'm bad at math. You just pick out your own pineapple:booze ratio. That's why God invented "Guess and check".

I'll end it with these.

Cups suck. This was a guy that was at my college. I code named him "Johnny Hammersticks."

Also if you haven't seen it: Dan Deacon & Liam Lynch - Drinking Out of Cups

I forgot I was in my own house where I do not have cats. See, Garfield does this thing where he poops in the bathtub.

Cartoon Me has better moves than Real Life Me.

There are drawings at the end, I swear.

So I saw "The Conjuring"

Not as scary as I thought and I absolutely hate scary movies. I like animated movies more. They tend to have more creative stories and I enjoy the art behind them too. I mean, I was blown away by how they created the evil face in the sky for "ParaNorman". 

I mean, "The Conjuring" wasn't a bad movie. To me, it had a nice build up (slow at times), and reached the peak halfway through and I just stopped caring.

My experience after the jump because, you know, spoilers.

Oh Mah Gadz It's August!

Brace yourselves, ragweed is coming.

Holy cheese on toast, I haven't posted in so long and by that I mean a week! Shame on me for being lazy and dealing with personal needs and spending my nights playing Xbox. 

Here's a depiction of how weird my boyfriend can be. 

And a reason as to why he's "beep booping" on this side of blog town....